I found this sat in my drafts folder from several months ago, when I was working full time at a very unsociable job in an unsuitable location in a sensorily overwhelming office . I am currently in bed, my tummy full of nourishing dinner, relaxed and preparing to start a day at my new job tomorrow, where I am supported and valued, and able to not only deal with daily stressors properly but also motivated to work hard . At the time that I wrote this, I was having up to ten meltdowns a day and often eating no more than a few mouthfuls of food because the stress was making me so sick. I was having dire, dark, depressed thoughts . I'm much better now; the piece below doesn't even feel like my writing. I'm as autistic as I ever was but I'm able to cope with the demands of my new job whilst learning to code on the side , working on my designs , and seeing my friends . And I'm having much fewer meltdowns ! My office is centrally located, well lit, and my team are supportive and deal with my autistic traits but also value my strengths that I bring to the company.
The reason I'm publishing this is because I want to demonstrate how my "functioning" levels and ability to cope in the world have waxed and waned according to how well my needs were accommodated and supported. I also want you, the reader at home; the autistic reader; the reader with an autistic friend, partner, or relative, to know that it does get better, even when things seem incredibly frightening and dark at the time.